Thursday, September 10, 2009

Solstice

INT - Chapel. A MAN stands by the altar, holding hands with the concept of SOLSTICE. A PRIEST is presiding.

PRIEST: Do you, Jacob Freehorn, take the Concept of Solstice to be your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, through sickness and in health, til death do you part?

MAN: I do.

PRIEST: By the powers vested in me by the state of -- I'm sorry. I can't do this. Are you thinking here, son? Do you really want to marry the Concept of Solstice? I mean, she's only gonna be around twice a year...

MAN: I know.

PRIEST: No matter what Solstice is not as much fun to say as Equinox...

MAN: I know.

PRIEST: And you're still not over your ex-wife who died in that accident two days ago...

MAN: Look, don't you think I know that? I'm just....I'm just feeling lucky, is all.

PRIEST: Oh! Well why didn't you say so! Feeling lucky?! Well, let's do this!

The roof of the chapel lifts off and a swarm of Griffins wearing DJ outfits fly in and play thumping dance tunes. Dwarves pop out of barrels and begin happily drinking while a beautiful skeleton dances with a violin.

BLACKOUT.

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